the things I couldn’t say to you

When I looked into her eyes, and you were looking back at mine,

I used to feel strengthened, yet terrified,

In despair, yet entangled in hope,

And I knew I was viewing my destiny.

But when I look into your eyes now, and when you look back at mine

I can’t feel anything, just a void.

I’ve learned the truth of curse

And how it’s been passed down by my ancestors,

and has infected our bloodline like an illness

It’s grew up with me since my birth.

That’s why the void is there. That’s why I feel I’ve failed you.

I’ve now given up.

I give up the morals I’ve tried to hold,

to convince myself that I’m a good person

The devil’s poison now passes through my veins

In an attempt to silence the crying

I know I’m killing myself.

It’s alright, and I hope one day you see that too

I hope you know I didn’t want to drag you into my wounds

I know you’re not ready to forgive me, and that’s okay, I understand.

I’m not the person I want to be, and I hate myself. But I know there’s no other choice.

I’m ready to never see anyone again.